The only thing I am hoping for is this: that you remember it as something special - something that was right at that time and something that made you feel happy and loved.
But I don't think you do.
Looking back at that time when you and I were so close. At that time when I sacrificed so much just to be with you. That time when all I cared about was us. I was blinded by our so-called "connection" that I didn't notice the person I was becoming. I didn't mind the opportunities I've lost. I didn't think about the consequences of the decisions I've made. All I cared about was you, us. And right now, I seriously cannot believe I did that.
Don't get me wrong, I regret nothing. And I don't despise you. It just really sucked for me to find out how everything meant nothing to you when it meant so much to me. It just really sucks to know that I gave up so much for something that not just didn't last long, but something that didn't "count" as well. I guess it was all just a game to you. I can't help but feel used. Like I was just some kind of rebound. Like "we" were just some kind of joke. It just really really really sucks.
Truth is, I've moved on. Long ago, actually. It just so happens that I've found out about this just a few days ago and it triggered my emotions; it made me remember those nights when I can barely sleep because I kept on thinking about what I did wrong, what made you leave... - thus this post. I just had to let it all out.
I have to admit, it was quite awkward to find you sobbing over a failed relationship. It doesn't oftenly happen that you're the one who gets hurt after it ends. I have no intention of offending you but I really think it's karma. You've become so uncontrollable. And insensitive, in a way. You know that, right? I just wish you can find a way to get better. Not just for that girl you love, but especially for yourself.